Random thoughts on a random Wednesday
* We got our tax return. Hurray! There were about 500 places the money needed to go. It's the best return we've ever had and it's also the year we needed it the most. NICU bills are overrated.
* I have cramps. So there's that. And while that totally stinks...it's also kind of awesome because it means my body is functioning somewhat normally and in a weird way, that's exciting to me.
* I have a MAJOR case of I-want-to-run-away-because-I-need-a-vacation-and-I-hate-winter.
* I started a job a few weeks ago that I knew I wouldn't enjoy. Even after the interview, I knew it would be rough. Transcription work is hard! It's isolating and lonely and overwhelming. I'm not good at it. I was told the turn over is extremely high and that it's a hard job but I was determined to give it a go because I thought it'd be cool to work from home and help supplement Danny's income. Motherhood is a juggling act WITHOUT adding an outside job into the mix. It was so hard to manage my time with a new baby and attending to his needs while meeting my deadlines while training for a hard job via emails back and forth from the home office in Seattle, WA. My trainer was impersonal and overly professional {to the point of coming across cold and uncaring}. When I expressed that I was struggling and could use some positive feedback--I got none. On two separate occasions. When I asked for clarification on something I felt was transcribed accurately but was corrected on , I was told to get nicer headphones. Kind of weird. People who work for them are tough and more thick skinned than me. I'll admit it. I talked at length with Danny about quitting because even though I hated it, I knew it would get somewhat easier...but the workload would quadruple after I was done with training and I didn't know how I would manage it all while trying to take care of Caleb {not to mention when Cole goes off-track}. This is also on top of me trying to get back in shape so I've been devoting more time to exercising and training for a half marathon. So...I quit. I didn't want to waste any more of their time or mine. I don't like feeling like a quitter but I feel good about the decision.
* I just finished my Power 90 workout and drank down a green smoothie with chia seeds and ground flax seeds and even though I'd rather have a slice of pizza {just keeping it real}, it feels good to eat good.
* Caleb is seeing a pediatric ophthalmologist tomorrow morning to have a look at his right eye. He saw the doc for his 4 month check up last week and it's something we've been concerned about so I was happy he took it seriously. Our pediatrician is awesome but he can be super laid back so I was worried he would brush it off. He wanted Caleb into a specialist within a week or two. Caleb is being looked at for amblyopia {loss of vision in one or both eyes}but we're not sure what's causing the eye crossing. Could be muscle weakness, vision problems or a neurological issue. Hopefully tomorrow will shed some light on it. I'm nervous. Hopefully it's an easy fix.
* We are beginning the process of looking for a home. I have no idea where we'll end up. It'll be awesome to have our own place again though. It doesn't need to be new or fancy or have granite counter tops. We just want a safe place to raise our kids.
* We're missing out on a trip to Disneyland at the end of the month and I'm feeling depressed about it. A bunch of the Whites are going and we didn't think we should spend the money to go when we're looking for a house which will most likely bring unexpected expenses. We should be responsible. But being responsible is SOOOOOOOOO BORING.
* Baby steps 'til Spring. Every winter I ask myself why we live in Utah.
* Watching the bond between Cole and Caleb is adorable. Cole is absolutely taken with his little brother and is such a good helper. I love watching him talk in his high-pitched, silly voice to try and get Caleb to smile or giggle.
* I've sung in church a couple times in the last month or two and I still get so nervous...it's kind of ridiculous. I do love to sing though. I'll be singing at the Relief Society birthday party in our ward next month too which should be fun.
The dishes are piling up so I'm going to try and tackle that before Caleb wakes up. Over and out.
* I have cramps. So there's that. And while that totally stinks...it's also kind of awesome because it means my body is functioning somewhat normally and in a weird way, that's exciting to me.
* I have a MAJOR case of I-want-to-run-away-because-I-need-a-vacation-and-I-hate-winter.
* I started a job a few weeks ago that I knew I wouldn't enjoy. Even after the interview, I knew it would be rough. Transcription work is hard! It's isolating and lonely and overwhelming. I'm not good at it. I was told the turn over is extremely high and that it's a hard job but I was determined to give it a go because I thought it'd be cool to work from home and help supplement Danny's income. Motherhood is a juggling act WITHOUT adding an outside job into the mix. It was so hard to manage my time with a new baby and attending to his needs while meeting my deadlines while training for a hard job via emails back and forth from the home office in Seattle, WA. My trainer was impersonal and overly professional {to the point of coming across cold and uncaring}. When I expressed that I was struggling and could use some positive feedback--I got none. On two separate occasions. When I asked for clarification on something I felt was transcribed accurately but was corrected on , I was told to get nicer headphones. Kind of weird. People who work for them are tough and more thick skinned than me. I'll admit it. I talked at length with Danny about quitting because even though I hated it, I knew it would get somewhat easier...but the workload would quadruple after I was done with training and I didn't know how I would manage it all while trying to take care of Caleb {not to mention when Cole goes off-track}. This is also on top of me trying to get back in shape so I've been devoting more time to exercising and training for a half marathon. So...I quit. I didn't want to waste any more of their time or mine. I don't like feeling like a quitter but I feel good about the decision.
* I just finished my Power 90 workout and drank down a green smoothie with chia seeds and ground flax seeds and even though I'd rather have a slice of pizza {just keeping it real}, it feels good to eat good.
* Caleb is seeing a pediatric ophthalmologist tomorrow morning to have a look at his right eye. He saw the doc for his 4 month check up last week and it's something we've been concerned about so I was happy he took it seriously. Our pediatrician is awesome but he can be super laid back so I was worried he would brush it off. He wanted Caleb into a specialist within a week or two. Caleb is being looked at for amblyopia {loss of vision in one or both eyes}but we're not sure what's causing the eye crossing. Could be muscle weakness, vision problems or a neurological issue. Hopefully tomorrow will shed some light on it. I'm nervous. Hopefully it's an easy fix.
* We are beginning the process of looking for a home. I have no idea where we'll end up. It'll be awesome to have our own place again though. It doesn't need to be new or fancy or have granite counter tops. We just want a safe place to raise our kids.
* We're missing out on a trip to Disneyland at the end of the month and I'm feeling depressed about it. A bunch of the Whites are going and we didn't think we should spend the money to go when we're looking for a house which will most likely bring unexpected expenses. We should be responsible. But being responsible is SOOOOOOOOO BORING.
* Baby steps 'til Spring. Every winter I ask myself why we live in Utah.
* Watching the bond between Cole and Caleb is adorable. Cole is absolutely taken with his little brother and is such a good helper. I love watching him talk in his high-pitched, silly voice to try and get Caleb to smile or giggle.
* I've sung in church a couple times in the last month or two and I still get so nervous...it's kind of ridiculous. I do love to sing though. I'll be singing at the Relief Society birthday party in our ward next month too which should be fun.
The dishes are piling up so I'm going to try and tackle that before Caleb wakes up. Over and out.
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