Seriously Walmart...Seriously


It's going to be tough to top that last post with Cole "singing", but it's time to address something that needs some attention. But first--some background. I tend to get stir crazy. I'm a SAHM (yes, there is an acronym for everything now! Stay at home mom, if you weren't familiar). Sometimes after Cole is down for the night, as is my hubby because he gets up EARLY for work in the mornings, I like to get out of our little apartment and give my eyes some stimulation aside from the blocks and toy cars I've been accustomed to all day. I hate to admit it--but more often than not, I end up at Wal-Mart. It's close, there is a variety of stuff to look at, and they're open late. As I'm typing this--I realize how lame this probably sounds to anyone with a life, but as is my case, I do not--and therefore, I wander around Wal-Mart because it beats anything on the television. Tonight was one of those nights. I just needed to pick up ONE little thing. It could wait for tomorrow. But why wait for Saturday when I could beat the crowds and get some fresh air for a bit? OH...this is why--when I pulled up in the parking lot, I realized that I forgot to wear my bullet-proof vest, and that I was fresh out of pepper spray. I didn't get the memo, that the cool place to hang out for thugs was right by the entrance of a Wal-Mart store! (OK, fine, they were 25 feet away from the actual door because they were all smoking), but still. So I was brave and got through the doors without incident. Fast forward to me being inside the store wandering around the electronics section, when I see/hear a bunch of ruckus going on. Yet another missed memo! It is no longer cool to hang out at the mall on Friday Nights. Oh no--malls are lame. It is all about Walms, and the interactive video games you can play with your buddies. I probably should have purchased some ear plugs so I didn't have to listen to them and their "colorful language". Needless to say--I had to wander somewhere else. Amidst my disappointment thus far, I do have to say one thing I really LOVE about Wal-Mart, and that is the fact that you can go in your pajamas, with no makeup on, in the middle of the night, and you don't look worse than anyone else there :) I don't mean that in a snobby way at all--but truly, it's much more comfortable than walking into Banana Republic or Ethan Allen where you feel like garbage the moment the employees cast down their eyes at you. Back to my story--next I find myself in the children's clothing department and strain to NOT listen to a mother rebuking her child for their bad behavior...all the while thinking to myself, why in the heck is your child up at this hour? No wonder she's not all smiles and sunshine. SHEESH. Take her home, and put her to bed...the poor thing. It basically went on like this until I got the item I needed to pick up and left. Once again--I had to fake bravery to the car and avoid eye contact with the guys hanging around outside the entrance. Usually after a rant like this, I try to justify my point, as if I need one to yammer on like this over a VERY typical visit to Wal-Mart, but honestly, I don't have one. I just felt like telling someone how ludicrous it was, and well...Danny is asleep!

Comments

Dave said…
Speaking as someone who has a life, you're right: that is extremely lame.

I kid, I kid.

Wow. Mysterious trips into the night. Colorful language. Guns and pepper spray. Expensive electronic equipment. Smoking. Bullet-proof vests. Snobby people. Bravery.

RaeLynn, are you a secret agent?
Kerry said…
Ha ha! I am so paranoid at night when I go anywhere...even if I'm by myself. So speaking from a person who doesn't have a life's point of view...I completely understand where you're coming from!!! I do things like that on a daily basis! I can be sitting in my apartment and hear people outside and start turning off the lights and pretending I'm not home...which, by the way, is completely retarded since they probably can see the lights turning off! So, my point, I HEAR YA SISTER!!!
Stephanie said…
LOL- great story- you seriously never know what you're gonna get when you go to Wal-Mart. Besides change in multiples of 2 cents.
That's hilarious! Just simply because I have had an extremely similar experience! Only I was witness to some thievery and was scared to "profile" the guys that were acting suspicious. I actually thought if I told on them they would know it was me and hunt me down on my way to the car. So I just mentioned it to the cashier on my way out. Never knowing what went down, or if they did anything about it. Funnily enough, our friend's brother is one of the managers of that walmart right by us, and I had a lengthy discussion about theft with him. He said they lose about 1500 dollars a day from theft. I couldn't believe it! He said prices would drop in half if theft stopped completely. Stupid thieves!

Look at me, ranting on your rant. Sorry so long...:)
kam said…
Gotta love walmart!!! You better hope your mom doesn't read this story (unless you edit the story and give Walmart an "alias"). ;);)
Kathy said…
AWES story! i LOVE walms. . . and i'm a walms night shopper too. als this: i HATE when i'm out at a store late and i hear kids fussing and getting in trouble for it - DUH people. DUH.
So funny! So true! and...so sad! My husband and I always wondered if we were the only ones that go there just to get away for a bit. It is always open, so what are you going to do at 10pm when you actually have a chance to get out? I loved your comment about Banana Republic! Why do they gotta make us walmart folks feel like trash? We need to send the Walm thugs over to their store, get a taste of their own medicine...
val said…
I would like to send a shout out to Walmart and you know my true feelings about the place...but I can't deny, Wally's world saved the day when last week I couldn't find "kraft old english cheese" at my normal grocery store...I KNEW I would find it at Walms and I did.
Even though I rarely ever enjoy my experience there...I was grateful for Walmart that day. And my cheese ball was delicious.
Deb said…
I love being a SAHM but most days are exhausting, espcically when you add in VP of PTA, karate, and Piano lessons! ARGH! Only 3 more weeks till my cruise with BBF to Cozumel, Ochios Rios and Grand Cayman- now thats a mom break!

Hope you have a great weekend! Stop by my blog if you can!

DEB
Amy said…
We should hang out more during the day :)
Kristen said…
lol - "very typical visit". So true. You are a brave woman. I won't set foot in a WalMart at high noon let alone the middle of the night! I guess Shayn & I would be considered "anti-Walmart". We have our myriad of reasons. But mainly it's because when we leave that place I feel like my IQ just dropped 20 points. Seriously. Last time we were there (4 years ago or so) we pass by this big ol' dude in his Nascar gear yelling, "Hey Ma! How 'bout we get this here deep fryer so's we can get fat!" Um, yea.
Aubrey said…
I hear ya Rae, I do the same exact thing. There is a lot of us out there that do the same thing. There is a handfull of women in our ward that like to do it, so we would run into the store a few times. So now we just call eachother, (mostly on Saturdays) to see if we can find a partner. You should try it, it is fun. And they like to wander like I do. I think all Walmarts attract that type of people. :) I seriously wouldnt shop there, but it is sooo close. And very convienent.
RaeLynn said…
Thanks for all your support everyone :) And Dave--I'd like to answer your question, I really would. But, at this time, I cannot.
$Ice$Man said…
No matter what I seem to be wearing...and tend to go into Banana they always look at me like I made a wrong turn. So yer def not alone in this!! But I hear ya on the new places for High School thugs to hang out..another one is the Smiths parking Lot on 109th S. and Redwood, they park theyre expensive cars and see who can cuss the loudest...I wish I did that back in the day.
oh my goodness, I thought I was the only one that did that! It must be a SAHM thing, because I never used to do that. John thinks it's funny that my idea of a break now is going grocery shopping or to wal-mart. it's just so nice to wander around and not to have to think. i would do it more in target if there was one close by, but alas, I make do with my local wal-mart (and probably save money because of it!) :)
as for the secret agent thing, well the dirty bird flies south at midnight. I think you know what I mean.....
katieo said…
I do the same thing. In fact, this is one of the reasons I LOVE the holidays. Stores open at like 5 am and close at 11. I can stay out so much later and not feel so freakish.
I never even buy anything. Just walk around and look at stuff. And people. I I usually go to Target, but maybe I'll have to start going to Walmart so I can run into you!
Nichole said…
I really like the Wal-mart in Jordan Landing because I never see these kinds of things happening there!! There is a whole different atmosphere compared to other Walmarts I go to. It is VERY busy though and if you go at 10pm at night you are faced with boxes all over and employees in your way!! I do shop at Wal-mart a lot though because I save sooooo much compared to Macey's.
BTW - Christian and I wear pj's wherever we go! Matching one's too...Yep we are nerds :)
janet said…
Why is it that no matter what time of day it is, moms are always yelling at their kids at Walmart... probably because they are white trash.

Moms at Banana Republic have their babies listening to classical music on their ipods while they shop.

I can totally picture you strolling through Walmart, wondering how to blog about the experience.. gotta love it.
RaeLynn said…
OK, now I'm just DYING of laughter at all your comments. Yep--I have the coolest friends ever.
Erin said…
Don't you have a Target close by?? I would give anything for a Target near my house. Wal-mart drives me absolutely out of my mind esp the one by my house. Its pretty much nasty but I go there anyway. When you have a couple kids you just can't beat one-stop shopping...