Why Didn't They Tell Me Part 8

I promised you that since I slacked for the last 2 weeks, this week was going to be good. And it is. Of course, just like the rest of the series there is a valid explanation for why the outcome of these pictures is NOT in any way, my fault.

Time: January of 2004
Place: Thanksgiving Point

Here I think I am going to look beautiful in my bridals. I had been referred to a photographer that was young and semi-inexperienced, but affordable. Maybe cheap is a better word. We get there and she explains to me that she has made me a bouquet of fake flowers to hold (that are supposedly my colors...but they really weren't). I was kind of embarrassed, but I was too nice to decline. So I held them. I should have noticed IMMEDIATELY when she started saying things like "where do you want to stand?" or "what should we do next?" that she had no clue what she was doing. Excuse me? I thought you were the photographer--aren't you supposed to POSE me? I'm not a model (obviously)...and I'm in this big, poofy white dress, could you at least throw out some ideas? For the love. So she starts putting me in all these awkward positions and making me stand certain ways and do weird things with my hands...I remember feeling awkward which would explain why I LOOK awkward in the pictures. Totally not comfortable. Totally not me. After the photo shoot I went home and was concerned (to say the least) about how the pictures would turn out. A couple days later she called me and had me drive to her to pick up the proofs (the 3x5 prints that were done at Walmart the day before). They were put in a cheap little flip book for me to look through. I sat there in HORROR. This could not be. These were NOT my bridals?!! I got home and after freaking out--took a deep breath and called her. I told her I wasn't pleased with her work and that I didn't want to continue with her service. We had to break up and I felt good about it.

If you're wondering: Yes, I got to keep the photos for free. No, I didn't pay her a dime. No, I did not and will not refer her to anyone.

This is the only picture that turned out reasonably.

Then things start getting weird...

I didn't realize that smashing your face up against a brick could be so attractive (wink, wink).

This one just freaks me out. Honestly--how does she not know anything about lighting??
She's a photographer for Pete's Sake.

Are you ready for this? This one will take this series to a whole, new level. And I don't know that I can keep up with this...but alas...


This was the DOOZY of the shoot.






I had no idea how I looked and she seemed to think that it looked fine.









If you EVER wondered what I would look like 9 months pregnant with multiples, keep scrolling..









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VOILA.
After this, I have no shame. My pride is broken.
Can you EVEN handle this?!?!

The whole thing was pretty ghetto. Thankfully, I was referred to a wonderful photographer who did a great job and made me feel pretty on my wedding day. Note: These were taken in the SAME place as the awful ones.