3:30 AM

I know this is ridiculous of me but when do I do things "normally"? I just had the weirdest experience and wanted to get it written {typed} somewhere before I forget just how hilarious/frustrating it is.

I just got woken up a few minutes ago by Cole in the doorway of our bedroom saying "Mommy! *chomp, chomp*, Do you want one? *chomp, chomp*, yummy, these are good!" I seriously thought I was seeing things. Of course, I WAS up late watching LOST last night and Hurley sees ghosts, so why shouldn't I?

So Cole comes up to my bed with a HUGE bag of cheetos. He is chomping away and talking 450 mph as he is telling me how good they are and how I should try one. I get up thinking "this is a joke--it has to be". It wasn't a joke. I half expected to see an energy drink in his other hand.

I walk out into the hallway and every single light in the house is on. {Editor's note: When I put Cole down for bed, I forgot to completely shut his door, which he can open anyway, but it at least makes it more difficult for him to want to attempt it} What do I do? Take the bag of cheetos and get him back in bed. He wants a story, a prayer, a diaper change, some fresh water and probably would have agreed to oral surgery if it would have postponed his going back to bed.

I finally get him back in bed and follow the trail of lights down a flight of 15 steep stairs, and into the kitchen. The first things I notice are this:

~His blanky on the floor right outside the pantry
~ A ton of Danny's cake decorating stuff out on the counter which was NOT there when we went to bed last night {a mere 3 1/2 hours ago}.
~A bowl with water and overly hydrated cheetos. Nasty.
~ I look into the pantry to find a huge box shoved against the side right below the 4th shelf where the cheetos were stored!

It is completely obvious to me what had happened. And this kid is something else! He will stop at NO lengths to get some junk food. That might freak most of you out, but in his defense, he DID eat only broccoli for dinner one night last week and another night ate only peas...so he's not material for Biggest Loser--simmer down people.

So picture in your mind little Coleman climbing out of bed, making his way down the stairs after turning on every single light in the house. He then gets downstairs, remembers that cheetos are yummy and that nobody is awake to stop him. He ditches his blanket and gets to work removing stuff out of one of the biggest objects on the floor of the pantry. He makes it light enough that he can move it with his own strength {unloading the box had to have taken AT LEAST 10 minutes}. He then climbed up onto the box, somehow reached the cheetos {I personally think he has go-go gadget arms} and started to enjoy his midnight snack. He must have been down there long enough to fill a cereal bowl full of cheetos and water because when I saw them they were totally huge and looked like sponges. Then he took his time dragging a huge bag of cheetos back up the long flight of stairs to share his treasure with Danny and I. I tried SO HARD to be mad at him, but I couldn't stop laughing! WHAT A CHARACTER. I'm going back to bed...