Lots of stuff

I've had a lot of things on my mind over the past weekend...but I don't really know how/what to say to really explain myself fully. I had a great weekend, and it all started with Friday. Danny and I went to the temple and had an amazing session. It was just one of those times where your mind is clear, you feel at peace, and the Spirit is strong. Later that night, we found out that my friend Brittany had been there for the first time doing baptisms! It was pretty cool to know that we were at the same temple, doing work for those who had passed on--and I thought a lot about how many changes she has made in her life, and how she is still the same Brittany, but a better version of herself. If you're reading this Britt--I love you! You still inspire me to be better everyday. Then Conference weekend was fantastic. I was lucky enough to attend the Saturday afternoon Session, and was overcome with the Spirit as Elder Nielson stood by Elder Wirthlin offering support (both literally and figuratively). I walked out of there feeling on top of the world. I could do anything. No trial was too tough, no tribulation too hard. I love that feeling. That night I got together with my mom and sisters-in-law to make homemade cards, and who doesn't love that? Sunday was great, and we celebrated (for the third and last time) Cole's birthday with my side of the family. We had a great family dinner, and had a good time hanging out. I miss the members of the family living in California. There's a definite void when they're gone...I can't wait until we are all together again!

Monday we had family night, and tried to read an Ensign article over Cole as he shouted whilst playing "cars", "trucks", and "toys". (Nothing he does is quiet). Then last night as I was laying him down to sleep, I laid by him for a few minutes and sang some songs to him. He loves to join in the actions on certain songs, and then I sang him a song that he didn't know. "Sing" by the Carpenters. I grew up listening to The Carpenters, and I remember my dad saying once that I sounded like Karen Carpenter, and even though I know that isn't really true--sometimes I like to pretend that I sound just like her, and that is what I did last night. I sang with Cole, and he just watched me, and smiled, and watched some more. Then he started joining in on the chorus when I repeated "just sing...sing a song". I got a huge lump in my throat because suddenly we were connecting on a deeper level than just the day-to-day grind. I know it sounds cheesy--but my heart was full of true joy as I laid there by him singing with him. It was one of those moments that as a mother, you cherish. He was being so cute that I didn't want to leave him to put him down to sleep! I wanted to just freeze that moment in time, so that I can go back to it whenever I need reassurance that he loves me, or whenever I feel down--I know that what I felt was real, and that he is my son and that nobody can ever change that.

Comments

Stephanie said…
Can you please edit your post to show at the beginning that you shouldn't proceed with reading without tissues?

Seriously tender. Especially the Cole part. Love those moments that make all the hard ones worth it.
Kathy said…
i want to freeze so many moments like that one with cole. it is those moments of true connection with your kids that are too precious for words and help you get through the everyday blah of life.
Raelynn, that is one thing I love about you, you are truly able to feel those moments and really appreciate them. It is inspiring to read! You really are a good mother when you can take that kind of time and share that love with Cole. And I believe that totally helps him too! In some way that I can't explain, but I believe those moments are important to him even though he might not be able to voice it.

Sometimes with the stresses of life I forget to just BE with my son. No tv, no radio, no distractions, just being. And you are right, those truly are the moments of experiencing pure joy!

Thank you for being you!

~Norda
kam said…
Thanks for sharing that Rae. It helps to get a little perspective from others on stressful days. Your story is just what I needed! Love ya! Give Cole a BIG squeeze from aunt kam!
val said…
What a great post Rae. So so precious and sweet. I love that he was singing with you. I'd love to be able to freeze those special moments too!
Erin said…
This is the kind of blog I want to create Rae- more for myself than anyone else. A place for me to record my feelings where others may have a peek. So don't be surprised if you checkout my blog and it looks and feels just like yours! :)
Cox Family said…
good for you for realizing the importance of the moment...so simple, and yet so precious and amazing!
janet said…
i love motherhood paydays. it's truly incredible watching your children grow and being able to experience the quiet moments with them.